Praise the lord I have found jebus…

Through facebook of all places. Who knew that is where I should have been looking all along.

Of course it was only a matter of time before I would “see the light”, but today is the day that the lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad in him…


So today somebody (James Rodney Crosby) messaged me on facebook. He is not a friend (facebook or otherwise) he just apparently found my name in a group and wanted to talk:

HEY I FOUND U IN ATHEIST GROUP READ THIS OK.

Which started a little back and forth (me in blue, him in black):

I’m curious…

Do you think the only reason I’m not a christian is because I have not read the bible? Because I’m sorry to disappoint you, I’ve read it multiple times and would be willing to bet I know it better than you do.

Do you think that because I’m not a christian my life is somehow less than if I was a christian? Because my friends and loved ones make my life as full and amazing as any life can be.

Do you think that my reading this I’ll suddenly become a christian? Because I could just as easily quote horrid passages from the bible that condone slavery, genocide, rape, pedophilia, etc…

What EXACTLY is your goal in sending me this?

—–

U NEED READ THE BIBLE MORE I HAVE READ IT 8 TIMES ALL THE WAY THROUGH NO I KNOW IT BETTER THAN U IF U SOO SMART THEN WHERE DOES THE WORD EASTER BE FOUND IN THE BIBLE WHAT BOOK?

—–

Like I said, I have read the bible multiple times. And I find it to be a poorly written book of horrendous tales…

Perhaps you enjoy submitting your life to a book of fantasies written by ignorant men trying to gain power by forcing others into submission, but I don’t.

As for your “test”:
The Bible The name “Easter” is never mentioned in the original Scriptures. However, one English translation of the Bible does use the word. The King James Version chose to translate Acts 12:4 like this:
“And when he [Herod the King] had apprehended him [Peter], he put him in prison, and delivered him to four quaternions of soldiers to keep him; intending after Easter to bring him forth to the people.”

Now, can you answer my question:
What EXACTLY is your goal in sending me this?

—–

its to get u saved to see if somebody like u has read the bible yea the book of acts is where EASTER IS MENTION u need JESUS U CAN STEEL GO TO HELL IF U NOT BORN AGAIN OK JESUS LOVES U TO.

—–

Re Easter in the bible:
Easter was NOT mentioned in the original texts at all.
The King James version added it, while it had not appeared in any earlier versions of Acts.

You’d be interested in Bart Ehrman’s book “Misquoting Jesus”, as it takes a very in depth look into the ways the text of the bible has changes over the centuries to what we have today…
—–
Re “to see if somebody like u”:
What EXACTLY is “somebody like me”?
—–
Re: “u need JESUS”
No, sorry but I don’t. I live a perfectly happy life without belief in ignorant fairy-tales…
—–
As for your “reason” for engaging me:
You want to “save” me. Ok.
Show me the evidence that the stories in the bible are true.
Show me how the bible does not contradict itself in multiple issues (the first two chapters of Genesis disagree on which was created first: man or animals).
Show me how it’s scientific inaccuracies are in fact not proof of it’s flawed writers (like when it claims bats are birds when they are in fact mammals or when it claims Pi is exactly 3 when in reality it is 3.141529…).
Show me how a book that condones slavery (and the beating of slaves the rape of women the slaughter of those of different faiths, etc) is not a horrendous example of some of the most depraved immoral things mankind has ever done.
Show me evidence that it is anything other than just a work of fiction.

I require evidence to base my beliefs on. Without evidence, the bible is nothing more than a collection of stories…

—–

EASTER IS IN THE BIBLE OK JESUS SAVES I HOPE U GO READ THE BIBLE FOR SURE STOP LIEING SAYING U HAVE READ IT WHEN U HAVENT AT ALL .

—–

THE BIBLE IS TRUE WHEN IT SAYS MANY WILL COME IN MY NAME SAYING I AM CHRIST JESUS SAID THAT 2,000 YEARS AGO SO THE BI LE IS NOT STORIES IT IS GODS WORD TO US AND IT IS A TRUE THING U BE JUDGED TO . THE BIBLE IS BEING FULLFILLED I HOPE U GET SAVED BYE

Unfortunately as this point my new “friend” changed his privacy settings so that he got the last word in (since I am no longer able to reply).

But at the very least, he gave me something to blog about today… Oh, and he saved my soul from hell… What a swell guy!

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About Rodibidably

Jeff Randall is a frequent volunteer for free-thought organizations, including the Center For Inquiry – DC. Having been blogging since January 2008, he decided that a community of bloggers would be an interesting new experience (or at the very least a fun way to annoy his friends into reading his posts more frequently). Since finding out about about the existence of, and then joining, the atheist/skeptic community in 2007 he has been committed to community activism, critical thinking in all aspects of life, science, reason, and a fostering a secular society.
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4 Responses to Praise the lord I have found jebus…

  1. writerdood says:

    About eight years ago I ran into a friend I hadn’t seen since High School. At that point in my life I was learning Flash development, and making a lot of little animations. I had one where you could put a coin in a slot and Superman would come out on a stage and dance. He wanted to see it, so I sent it to him as an executable. He came back with another one saying, “hey, have a look at this and tell me what you think!”

    It was a flash animation of the crucifixion.

    It was fairly nicely done though, in terms of the art and motion, and I told him so. But I didn’t discuss the content. Of course, not long after that I received various other attempts at evangelism, which I ignored. Poor guy. They got him. I thought he was smarter than that, I mean, I knew this guy. He wasn’t stupid. But it didn’t matter, they got him anyway. It must have been when he was weak and when he needed something, and they were there for him with an emotional pacifier. His life wasn’t exactly easy, he had a lot of problems, so I suppose they gave him what he needed.

    That’s life though. What can you do?

    • Jeff Randall says:

      I’ve had people try to convert me many times, but something about this particular one was just so pathetic I had to share…

      Typically I just tell former friends (or co-workers, or whoever I know personally) that I appreciate the sentiment, but I find it highly offensive and would prefer they not tell me that my life is lacking because I don’t believe in the same ignorant superstitions that they do.
      I find the “ignorant superstitions” part usually pisses them off enough, they don’t try a second time…

  2. poietes says:

    Truly, I am impressed by this exchange. Not because of your content or retorts or anything like that. I’m impressed that you spent more than five seconds talking to someone who uses u for you and has obviously never met a period or comm in his life.

    • Jeff Randall says:

      It did get harder to follow his “points”… No I don’t want to call what he was trying to say “points”, I think that gives him too much credit. To follow his ramblings… Yeah, that works…

      It did get harder to follow his ramblings as the conversation went on. I’m not sure how much longer I would have kept it up, but I was not given the chance to find out as he seemingly blocked me before I had to make up my mind.

      The thing I would LOVE to know about this guy (and people like him) is do they REALLY think that their methods (all caps, telling me I’m “LIEING”, not answering questions, etc) will convert somebody? Even if you believe in god, jebus, allah, l ron hubbard, etc; wouldn’t you want to make the best possible impression on people that you’re trying to convert? Doe he think that he made a good impression? Does he think he made a good case for christ?

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